The following is a meditation for the third fundamental motivation of existential analysis, helping us answer the question of, am I allowed to be me? With an affirmative yes.
The speaker and creator is Graham Nelson-Zutter.
Please take a moment to find a seated position where there's support for your back and an ability to place your feet flat on the ground.
You may also find a position sitting in lotus that feels comfortable.
It may also be helpful to have a posture where your back is a little more vertical with your head above your spinal column with very little strain on your neck.
You may also have a position where you are resting your head or leaning your head, just taking a moment to see if there's an opportunity to find any more comfort.
Perhaps there are pillows or some kinds of adjustments that you can make to get more comfortable.
I invite you to close your eyes and if at any point you find that that's uncomfortable or doesn't feel safe, that's okay.
If your eyes are open, perhaps you can find a place to rest your gaze, maybe at a pattern on the wall or someplace where there isn't distraction or movement.
I invite you to take a few moments to get centered in your body,
starting with the feeling of the ground beneath your feet, the floor beneath your feet,
noticing the pressure, the texture.
If you're wearing footwear or socks or shoes of some kind or there's a carpet below you,
just noticing the texture the softness or firmness between you and the floor,
taking a moment to notice this physical support from under your feet, under your legs.
Just taking a moment to shift your awareness towards your knees and your hamstrings, starting to feel the support from under your upper legs,
noticing the shift and pressure between the backs of your knees towards your hips and glutes and sitting bones,
taking a moment to notice the firmness and support under your torso,
shifting your awareness to your lower back, starting to notice the support from behind you as well,
traveling to your middle back and upper back, shoulders, noticing those places of contact with the support behind you and
taking a moment to shift your awareness to your breathing without the need to change how you're breathing.
When you inhale, perhaps you can feel the expansion and opening within your chest.
When you exhale, perhaps you can feel the sensations of rest and relaxation in your chest.
And when you inhale,
noticing how you're bringing nourishment in the form of oxygen into your body,
replenishing what your cells need, what they thrive on.
And as you exhale, releasing the carbon dioxide that your body no longer needs.
Maybe noticing where your skin is exposed to the air, sticking in the experience of being in contact with the air,
the very same air that holds this oxygen that you're inhaling and the carbon dioxide that you're releasing.
Perhaps you notice the temperature of the air on your skin,
inviting you to also notice that you're wearing clothing, just noting those areas of your skin covered by clothes.
Perhaps there's a light pressure from your clothes. Maybe there's a shift in temperature.
Perhaps you can even feel the texture of the fabric.
Noticing that both your skin and your outside world.
Taking a moment to realize there's nothing for you to do.
This boundary that your skin and clothing provides is just there.
Maybe noticing that you've continued to breathe, even without the need to focus on your breath.
If you forget to breathe, that's okay. Your body will continue to breathe for you.
Noticing the support from behind and below.
They too do not require any kind of doing. They're just there.
Just taking a moment to realize that this protection, this openness and support are just here.
Maybe also taking a moment to notice what it's like to calm,
to shift your focus towards your experience of the now
at this moment and at this time.
Connecting with yourself and
giving yourself the opportunity to just slow down, to spend some time with you, to be close with yourself,
and to take the time to just notice
how you are in this moment.
In our previous session,
we noticed that we have a relationship to the earth as it supports us and as it does in this moment as well.
We also took some time to notice this vitality of the breath and its connection to our plant friends.
Noticing how we're in relationship with trees and that when the sun shines, that sunlight helps the trees take the carbon dioxide that we exhale and share with them and transform that carbon dioxide into oxygen, the very same oxygen that we breathe.
Just taking a moment to notice this relationship between your body and the nourishment that you receive in the form of breath and that reciprocity that we have with all the trees in the world.
Next, I'm going to invite you to imagine a bit of an adventure, an adventure we can go on together.
I invite you to imagine that you're strolling and you come upon a park or a meadow.
This may be a park or a meadow that you're familiar with.
It may be an entirely new place.
Taking a moment to notice what it's like to cross this threshold from the busy world of humans
into the world where there's a little more room for nature,
a little more space for life.
Giving yourself permission to cross this threshold and enter into this more natural space.
Just see where you feel like going perhaps you're drawn this way or that.
Giving yourself permission to make whatever choice feels right for you and
as you continue to stroll through this open space,
you notice a tree.
You feel drawn to this tree so you gently make your way towards it.
This may be a tree that you've met before.
It may be an entirely new tree.
Taking a moment here to notice the shape of this tree.
Do you notice if it's more tall than wide or more wide than tall?
It's noticing the energy of this tree and how it takes space.
How comfortable it seems where it is.
Noticing how its pace seems to be at a really gentle, patient time scale.
As you take in the tree you notice off to the side that there's a picnic table.
It seems as if something has been left on this picnic table.
Following your curiosity, making your way over to the picnic table, noticing that there seems to be some objects on this table.
There is a box of colored crayons with so many choices of colors.
There's a little stack of nice art paper.
There's a nice bag that's perfect in size to carry these supplies around.
And there's a little note left on top of the paper near the crayons.
And the note just says, enjoy.
Noticing that you've made space to be in this environment.
Taking a moment for yourself to just be with nature.
The choice presents itself that you too might take a moment to enjoy yourself even more.
And you decide to sit down on the bench seating of this picnic table.
Noticing that the table and the seating is facing the tree that you are just admiring.
And it dawns on you that you could draw this tree.
And as you begin to look at this tree, you feel inspired to choose crayons from this box of crayons.
Noticing the different colors of the tree.
There may have been times in the past where coloring felt difficult or like you had to get it right.
And this is not one of these moments.
Today, drawing is easy.
And this practice is just for you in this moment.
As you notice different parts of the tree, you're able to draw these shapes, textures, and colors with ease on the paper.
You notice the shape of the tree, how tall and how wide it is.
Noticing if this tree has leaves or needles.
Noticing the shape and the color of the canopy of this tree.
Drawing all of that in with ease of the colors that feel right.
Making your way to the branches and the bows of the tree.
All the way to the trunk of the tree.
Noticing the color of the bark.
Whether it is smooth or bumpy.
Maybe it has ridges.
Noticing that different parts of the bark may have different colors.
And you draw whatever you want to from this tree as you notice its shapes and colors and movement.
There's no right or wrong way.
As you use these colored crayons, you notice to feel this sense of satisfaction. That your perception, your admiration for this tree is being captured in this moment. In your rendition, you're noticing your inspiration of this great tree.
If you feel like it, you can also use one piece of paper or multiple pieces of paper.
Taking your time to focus wherever your attention goes.
There's no right or wrong here.
Whatever you feel drawn towards, you can draw on the paper.
And as your drawing or drawings take shape, you notice how nice they are.
Almost like you're respecting this tree. You're giving
a rendition that captures some essence of how you feel towards this tree. The impact that it has on you to be in its presence.
Be noticing how nice it is to spend this time allowing yourself to be creative and
really appreciating how beautiful this tree is in this setting.
Feeling good that there are spaces like this.
It's important to have these spaces where you can be creative and connect with nature.
And as you draw and collect all of your impressions,
at some point when you're ready, it dawns on you that a really close friend of yours is going to be at a cafe not long or far from here.
And having had so much fun expressing yourself and being creative, you feel pretty satiated and decide, yeah, it'd be really nice to see this close friend of mine.
You collect your crayons back in a crayon box and assemble your beautiful drawings of this tree.
And you take the paper drawings and crayons and put them in this satchel, this bag that they fit in perfectly.
And as you collect them, you start to make your way towards the entrance of this meadow or park.
And before you leave, just taking a moment to look over your shoulder,
feeling this sense of enjoyment with this tree and this green space.
Almost imagining like the tree is saying goodbye to you.
Maybe offering you a see you later
and feeling the sense of warmth from this connection you've had with the tree.
Making your way out of the park, strolling towards this park, this cafe.
As you arrive, you notice your friend.
And your friend already knows what drink you like.
Whether you're a coffee or tea person, they've chosen the drink that you like, that you've told them that you enjoy in the past.
And it's such a nice treat to sit down with them, seeing that they remembered what you like.
You notice the warmth of being close to someone that cares for you, that you care for.
Maybe you get a nice hug or a little bisou, cheek to cheek.
You sit down and you start to catch up.
Noticing how nice it is to spend this time with this friend.
Maybe noticing their gestures, how they move, the tone of their voice, their sense of excitement and interest, and how their energy affects you.
And your friend asks you, what have you been up to today?
How has your day off been?
And it dawns on you that you had just recently spent some time in a clean space.
Did you share this experience with your friend?
And part of telling your story includes, oh yeah, the darndest thing happened. I was walking in the park, in this meadow area, and I noticed this beautiful tree that really captured my attention.
And as I walked closer to the tree, I noticed there was a picnic bench with crayons and art paper, and this sack that I'm carrying right now.
And your friend looks at you in amazement and pleasure, and you share with them that you decided to take the time to enjoy the crayons, enjoy the art paper, and just having a moment of expression.
No one was there to evaluate your work or tell you what to do or not do, and you found yourself in this moment of easy inspiration and connection with your creativity, noticing what it felt like to really appreciate and be inspired by the shape of this tree.
And your friend asks you, would it be possible to see your drawings?
And in this moment, you notice the sense of joy and courage, and with excitement, you open up your bag and bring out your beautiful drawings,
showing them to your friend.
And as your friend takes in the art that you've created, you hear their comments on how beautiful the shapes are, how much they appreciate your choice of color, how vibrant these colors are.
Your friend zooms in on little details that you've captured, or the abstract sense of movement of the tree that you've captured.
You notice just how much care you've put in and how much joy it looks like you had while creating these drawings.
Your friend says to you, wow, it really feels like you captured the personality of this tree.
I'm so glad you had this opportunity. Thank you so much for sharing with me. What a lovely surprise. A lovely surprise that you got to find the tree.
A lovely surprise that these tools of art were left for you to enjoy. And what a lovely surprise for your friend to be able to enjoy your creativity.
There's a real sense of appreciation from your friend.
And in a moment of inspiration, you ask them if they would like one of your drawings.
And they reply, yes, I would love one of your drawings. I know just where to put it.
And they describe the place in their home or their office where they'd really like to be able to see your drawing and enjoy it.
They describe how other people in their home and their workspace will also have the benefit of enjoying this portrait of this beautiful tree that you found.
And you've done such justice to this tree. You've had so much freedom in your expression that you feel super comfortable about this idea of other people appreciating your art. Maybe you're not an artist, and yet you're so capable of creativity and connection.
And you notice the sense of pride, maybe even a sense of justice that is good and right to spend this time being expressive, connecting with nature, being creative,
noticing just how good it feels to share your discovery of this beautiful tree with your friend.
And you and your friend continue to have your lovely catch -up conversation, sipping your drinks.
And after you both have had lots of chances to share about your lives, things that are happening, updates on relationships, you notice that it's a natural time to say goodbye, you and your friend making plans for a future hangout.
And you start to make your way home, waving goodbye to your friend,
noticing the sensation in your body of what connection feels like.
And also what it's like to be really vulnerable with someone and have that vulnerability accepted with such enthusiasm and interest.
What a good experience.
You feel pretty satisfied that it's right for you to take the time to really rest and relax in a park, to give yourself this gift, this opportunity to enjoy nature and discover such a beautiful tree and how generous and kind it was for this unknown stranger to leave these art supplies for you. What a lucky, wonderful moment.
And what a surprise it was for you to share your creativity with your friend.
What a good day,
just enjoying your stroll on the way home.
And as you get into this rhythm of your stroll,
I invite you to start to return to the shared space, the space where your physical body is, the space where this physical support is underneath you and taking your time.
If your eyes are closed, gently opening them and coming back into this room together and
giving yourself just another moment to appreciate this investment of time connecting with your creativity and your intuition.
You'll be noticing what it would be like if you gave yourself more of this time,
this growing awareness that you deserve to spend more time with nature and that nature would like to spend more time with you.
And that this connection between you and nature is something that also improves other people.
Sharing our experiences in nature with those we care for brings connection and joy to them as well and may inspire them to also take this time to connect and be in nature.
